#RevOfKindness Challenge week 6 Kindness Without Expectation @NikiMeadowsWA

Week 6 is about Kindness Without Expectation

Niki’s Kindness Without Expectation Exercise-

Think of the times you expect something in return for the kindness you extend. It might be something small like hearing thank you or it might be hoping it’s reciprocated. How does it feel when you do something kind and don’t get what you expect in return? What do you receive by doing kind things or being kind even if you don’t expect it?

Take note of the times you’re kind without expectation this week. How did it feel? Did you end up getting something in return anyway?

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Here is Britain the week has been overshadowed by the terrible Grenfell tower-block fire. Examples of kindness without expectation can be seen from the people sending clothes and donations to those left with nothing after their homes and lives were destroyed.

In my own life, I went through my own exercise on this subject around a year ago. I felt trapped in a cycle of helping or volunteering, which I then resented when I didn’t get thanked or appreciated in the ways that I expected. But who was I to judge others reactions? Via some deep soul searching and questioning of my thoughts and feelings I decided that it would be healthier to me to continue to help others and volunteer, but to change my expectations. Now I work on telling myself that it doesn’t matter how others react, what matters more is that the universe will be grateful.

#RevOfKindness Challenge Week 4 Kindness Role Model @NikiMeadowsWA #SundayBlogShare

Week 4 of the RevOfKindness Challenge is about Kindness Role Models

I chose to look at this from nature’s point of view. Whilst out walking I meditated on the humble bee. According to the bumblebee conservation organisation there are around 250 species in the UK: 24 special bumblebees, 225 solitary bees species and only 1 honeybee variety.

I thought about how a bee has the ability to fly between each flower and through an action, which has no malice, drinks nectar whilst providing a pollinating service. A bumblebee lives in a small colony and creates only enough honey-like substance for its own colony. A honeybee lives in a much larger colony and can produce more honey than the “hive” can eat.  Beekeepers usually manage honeybee hives and it can be an extremely peaceful and fulfilling interaction. In return for a safe home, from predators and the cold winter months, bees share their honey.

I know many people fear bees because of their sting and loud buzzing, but bees usually only sting as a last resort, or when threatened. A honeybee will die once it stings you, so it doesn’t go out intending to attack.

As I crossed a field and entered a wood, I heard buzzing which grew louder and bees darted this way and that. I stopped; on a warm June day, I suspected the bees were swarming, this is when part of the colony leave with a rival queen to set up a new colony. The bees are in search of a new home, I couldn’t see where the group were waiting, whilst the scouts went ahead, but when I passed by on my way back, all was quiet.

This week, a bee was an ideal kindness role model. As I thought about the bees, whilst I strolled across a buttercup covered knoll, my word for this came to me – RESPECT

I have always liked the folklore of telling honeybees important events in your life. It was thought that keeping the bees informed about a beekeepers family, kept the hive strong and the production of honey certain. So I shall leave you with a couple of poems.

Bees work for man,
and yet they never bruise

Their Master’s flower,
but leave it having done,

As fair as ever and as fit to use;
So both the flower doth stay
and honey run.

– George Herbert, The Church-Providence

How Doth the Little Busy Bee

Isaac Watts

How doth the little busy bee

Improve each shining hour,

And gather honey all the day

From every opening flower!

How skilfully she builds her cell!

How neat she spreads the wax!

And labors hard to store it well

With the sweet food she makes.

In works of labor or of skill,

I would be busy too;

For Satan finds some mischief still

For idle hands to do.

In books, or work, or healthful play,

Let my first years be passed,

That I may give for every day

Some good account at last.

2017 Kindness Challenge #RevOfKindness Week #2 Self-Compassion @NikiMeadowsWA

The 2017 Kindness challenge has been created by Niki Meadows Week #2 is all about Self Compassion What is Self Compassion? Self–compassion is extending compassion to one’s self in instances of perceived inadequacy, failure, or general suffering. Kristin Neff has defined self–compassion as being composed of three … Continue reading

2017 Kindness Challenge #RevOfKindness Week #1 Self Love @NikiMeadowsWA

Kindness Challenge Week #1 Self-Love

What is self-love?

Definition: A regard for one’s own well-being and happiness.

My own challenge is to become more aware of each of the challenge weekly topics and how I find them in my own life.

Looking deeper into self-love, I decided to read a couple of articles on self-love.

I chose this article from Psychology Today written by Deborah Khoshaba Psy.D. In it she describes self-love as the following:

“Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth.”

In the full article there is also a 7 step guide to improving self-love.

The second article I read was 30 ways to practice self-love and be good to yourself this post from LifeHack.org had lots of ideas which appealed to me, reminding me about my passion in life (books and reading) and how to make time to appreciate the good things in my life.

Niki set the following for us participants:

Self-Love Exercise-

The exercise for this week is to take note of all of the ways we think we have to earn or prove our love to ourselves. If you have a hard time, you might try to notice the times you find yourself feeling like you’re not good enough. After you’ve taken a couple of days to observe and take notes, I encourage you to come up with your own personal mantra or affirmation. Whenever you find yourself falling into the habit of thinking you aren’t good enough or deserving of self-love, repeat your mantra to yourself. Some of you might want to write it down and put it on your mirror or screen saver.

The articles and the challenge encouraged me to do the following this week:

  1. I begin with a spring clean of my house, removing mess and clutter helped to calm my mind.
  2. I lit a scented candle to clear the air of cloying mustiness and lift the atmosphere in the house. The candle is in a glass which has “This Home Is Blessed With Happiness” written on the side, which I made time to read and to think about.
  3. I thought about things I was grateful for:
  • I recently won a Waterstones book voucher and the contributor added a copy of his favourite book which was an ideal gift for me. The young man showed he had truly thought about the gift as a thank you for help I’d recently given him with a university project.
  • Next was a personal challenge I’ve been working on for several weeks. I want to become fitter for our Canadian adventure holiday in July. I have been increasing my exercising and changing my diet. I am impatient and want insta-results, but I’ve had to work hard. Recently I have noticed an improvement in my body shape and now it makes me smile and I appreciate the body I have.

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I took out my book Power Words by Sharon Anne Klingler and re-read some of my favourite passages, then on a pretty postcard I wrote some power words for my week of self-love. I said these and thought about them as much as I could during the week.

Whilst reading a different book I found more guidance; the characters in this book were having a conversation and I picked out the following points to think about during my week of self-love:

  • First of all two questions- “Are you worthy of receiving a gift? Are you worthy of forgiving yourself?”
  • Then advice – “Love the personal space around you and learn to truly love yourself.”

Found in an ARC of Destiny by India R Adams (a book with an apt title for this challenge)

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The challenge is run by Niki Meadows check out her blog here

2017 Kindness 7 week Challenge with @NikiMeadowsWA #REVOFKINDNESS #MondayBlogs

2017 Kindness Challenge I’ve signed up for the 2017 Kindness Challenge run by Niki Meadows, who is a Worthiness Ambassador. A 7 week challenge following weekly prompts. The challenge begins on May 7th and there is still time to sign … Continue reading