Today’s team review is from Alison, she blogs at http://alisonwilliamswriting.wordpress.com/
Alison chose to read and review White Collar Option by Bill Johnstone
White Collar Option by Bill Johnstone
There is so much potential in the storyline of this novel. An English journalist, Mike McCabe, trying to live a peaceful life on his boat in London, is sent to Washington by his editor – a place he seems to want to avoid. The reason for his trip – A US senator, Charles McKinsey, has been shot in the back. Did he disturb an intruder, or is there something more sinister behind his shooting? And what about the near fatal car crash involving John Rochester – newspaper tycoon and owner of the paper that Mike works for?
Aided by a local detective and a young woman close to both the Rochesters and the McKinseys, McCabe’s investigation leads him into a tale of political intrigue, violence and conspiracy involving the financial sector and foreign interests.
A great storyline then, and a likeable, interesting and relatable main character – one of those journalists that you sympathise with, that you want to solve the case. I liked Mike and I was interested in the story. But I was rather disappointed in the execution.
I wanted to get straight into this story, but there is a great deal of ‘telling’ the story, a lot of back story. This is a political thriller – I want action and intrigue, snappy dialogue and a fast pace. A good honest edit to tighten the writing would have made this a far punchier read.
A good edit might also have highlighted the grammatical issues. Unfortunately the novel needs a really thorough proofread. Dialogue, in particular, is consistently punctuated incorrectly, and after a while this became a distraction, drawing me away from the writing.
3.5 out of 5 stars
Find a copy here from Amazon.co.uk or Amazon.com
Rosie Amber 
Thank you for the review, although I saw this several months ago when first posted. It was helpful and changes have been made accordingly. However, the book is a scene-setter for the series, so there is necessary background. But tightening up and using ‘A Preface’ helped. The punctuation flaws have been tackled too. Many thanks to those who spent their time reading and reviewing.
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Shame – alas, the first one of a series has to really grab the reader or they won’t read any more. Hope the author manages to remedy this successfully 🙂
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Reblogged this on Barrow Blogs: and commented:
Time to give this a second chance?
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Reblogged this on theowlladyblog.
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